I know why you’re paranoid. They *are* out to get you.
Okay, some days you don’t know whether to cheer or scream when you’re proven right. At this year’s Chlotrudis nominating committee meeting last Saturday, I mentioned to several people the odd fact that one cannot search “Shortbus” on IMDB and get the intended result: the beautiful soul-enriching film by John Cameron Mitchell. Now, thoughts of censorship flashed through my mind, especially because I’d searched all the other 273 Chlotrudis-eligible titles without difficulty. And because you can get to the Shortbus page through a search for John Cameron Mitchell. But silly me. I gave IMDB the benefit of the doubt and put it down to a flaked out index.
Well don’t I feel stupid? Read this. Especially the part about the films you can find in IMDB.
Question 1: What’s the big fucking deal? It’s not as if they are screening the films. The “objectionable content” isn’t displayed and never has to be.
Question 2: 9 Songs? Hello…. no more porn that The Brown Bunny, which is unretrievable by title. And A Hole in My Heart is retrievable? Holy shit.
Question 3: How does Helen Mirren feel about the fact that people can get to Caligula through her entry on IMDB… but not by the title?
Question 4: Do you know who owns IMDB? Amazon.com. I know it’s convenient. But please think again before you buy anything from them. And I apologize in advance to my friends with wish lists. You may get duplicates.
Question 5: How are you supposed to know that you aren’t getting hits because you haven’t registered and enabled “adult titles” to come up in searches?
What the hell is wrong with people?
Oh, and get this! The blog post I referenced is wrong. You don’t need an IMDB Pro account to enable “adult content” searches. But you better not be using Internet Explorer! I don’t know why yet, but in Mozilla Firefox, I can enable such searches in my free, registered account. But even with this setting enabled, I can’t find Shortbus in Internet Explorer! And I can’t even find the setting in that browser. WTF?!
Sweet Dreams
Just came home from seeing The Science of Sleep at the Coolidge, which I really dug. Then I saw this scrumptious YouTube vid posted by Susan on the [title of show] blog. Now I think it’s time for bed. What do you think I’ll be dreaming about tonight?
Push Me Pull You
So, I keep coming back to children’s literature when I think of what makes “me” the person I am. And sometimes it scares me.
Why do all the classics I can think of have imperialist themes?
- Doctor Doolittle is a “vegetarian” who really craves the flesh of his patients.
- Babar would be nothing if he didn’t learn western ways. He certainly wouldn’t be king!
- Is the conclusion that Ozma is a “fair and gentle” ruler enough justification to alter the way of life of the people in hidden countries of Oz?
- How do those Narnia kids have *any* real claim to the throne of the country?!
And as a postscript… do you ever have nightmares about being held up against Mary Poppins’ tape measure? I do.
I Dream of Jeannie = Fight Club?
Maybe it’s that I’ve just been laying in bed for hours on end trying to shake this cold/flu/whatever I’ve got, but I had the craziest idea regarding everyone’s favorite Barbara Eden sitcom, I Dream of Jeannie. You know how Bewitched is often cited as a coded sitcom about a gay couple? Samantha has to keep her natural flamboyancies hidden and keep her friends and family out of the living room so Dirwood won?t be ?outed?? Well, even more prevalent are arguments about which magic gal could kick her rival’s butt: Jeannie vs. Samantha. It’s a tempting debate. The two shows are pretty similar. So, following the thought… is there also hidden homo-subtext in Jeannie?
It’s kind of hard to just lay the Bewitched template on top of Jeannie. Tony doesn’t have to explain to anyone why Jeannie’s a little wacky. He totally keeps her out of sight from everyone but his best friend, Roger. (Okay, later they get married and stuff, but I’m talking about the original concept for the show.) And while Jeannie’s fellow genies show up now and then, Tony’s not afraid that they won’t behave — he’s petrified they’ll be seen at all! Endora’s pretty eccentric at first glance, but anyone in puffy pants and a fez is pretty hard to take seriously.
So if Jeannie and Tony aren’t a gay couple, why is the Major so uptight? Consider this: his greatest fear is that Dr. Bellows, a military psychiatrist, will discover what he’s bottled up — something that his horny best friend would love to get at. He’d love to get rid of it (remember, this is 1965), but it just won’t go away! It could easily make his life much more enjoyable, but he’s in total denial.
Yep. Jeannie is Tony’s inner gay boy. I can’t wait for the movie adaptation. Much more interesting than Fight Club, wouldn’t you say?